GUEST POST BY: DANI ROCCO | RELATIONSHIP EXPERT. TV HOST. BEST SELLING AUTHOR
Why is it so hard to embrace the past? Do we really believe – We learn from our mistakes… if so, each mistake is a blessing, right?
There are no mistakes in life, if this is true then every action and situation has been perfectly placed.
If every person that enters your life is put there for a reason – then why do we hold onto the pain from relationships?
Testing your faith
We talk about faith, morals and our beliefs as part of who we are. For the most part we don’t question them- they just silently represent us. We fall back and announce them when we feel our actions or thoughts are in question of others.
What you put your energy into is where you will grow. What you practice is what will evolve and develop. Developing your faith is no different than a physical skill. When developing a physical skill, you set up goals and mile markers to hit in order for you to measure progress. When each marker is hit success is felt and this is cause for celebration. When your goals are not hit you readjust your plan of action. This is a common practice and is applied with ease and understanding. If reaching your goals requires an expert in that field, you acquire one.
Why is this practice not so easily applied when it comes to your faith? Do you have measurable goals or a plan to practice your faith? Faith is not only towards your religious beliefs. Faith can be your moral compass, the thoughts of how you feel towards yourself and abilities, how you see the world etc. Faith has a foundation in your beliefs but the actions that come from your faith are intertwined in that belief. Take some time and explore your measurable goals in how you see applying faith in your daily life.
Does your past dictate your future?
Your past has the ability to create pain, walls, and be the #1 factor in your thoughts & actions moving forward in life. There are 2 paths when dealing with your past –
• The path on the left leads us down a road of being captive and giving your power away.
• The path on the right puts the power of your thoughts & actions into your hands.
When you take the path on the left you spend your life in regret, shame, fear and pain. Why take it then? Imagine looking at a fork in the road. The one on the left looks straight and level and is freshly paved, the path on the right has steep mountains with sharp turns and bumpy gravel road. No brainer right – go to the left. What you don’t see over the horizon is the left is filled with dead ends, road blocks and will continuously bring you back to that same fork in the road. The right on the other hand – just over the horizon of the steep mountains turns into a straight as an arrow, no speed limit road that leads directly to every destination of your choosing.
This visual concept is no different than dealing with your past EXCEPT those roads are your emotions, your regrets, your shame and your fears.
Today lay out both roads. Visually see on paper what is on the road to your left. No matter what you have done, seen, didn’t do, have said or not said. This is when your faith is tested. Do you believe you can be forgiven and if so, why are you not forgiving yourself? Dig into your faith. If you truly believe you can be forgiven by God than you most face what you have created as your demons and put your energy towards your faith and forgiveness.
Energy is everywhere, and like energy attracts like energy. If you do good / are nice because “you have to”, “its expected of you”, “you will benefit from it” that is exactly what you are going to attract back in your life. People and environments that have hidden agendas.
There are levels of this energy and actions. There are times it is clear your actions and thoughts are to appease or acquire an outcome. Other times it’s so subtle you have no idea your motives are self-serving. Your ego is in charge and blinding you from the truth of your motivation.